Grief / Loss | Andrea Mai

REFLECTION ON SIX YEAR ANNIVERSARY, PRINCE CELEBRATION 2022

Ever since 2016, after Prince’s passing, I’ve noticed snow in April. This year was no exception. It snowed here on Easier Monday. I heard that this year was supposed to be an early spring according to the groundhog, but it doesn’t feel like it to me…

I’ve continued to record EVP, though I’ve been busy with my work. I get the sense that he is content, where he is. I think that people’s feelings on the other side is very transparent. And sometimes I hear them say things like “You are happy”, or “Prince happy”. Where he is at, it is a joyful existence, filled with friends, foodie treats, and lots of fun.

I’ve been avoiding Facebook in the past year, it has been where the place where I get most Prince related news. So I don’t always know what is going on, as I just don’t pay attention to FB anymore, But recently, I could remember one time thinking to myself, wishing that there was some kind of video recording of Prince when he was a kid. I wondered if there was any chance that such a thing existed. I wanted to hear his kid voice. And then one day, I went onto my FB feed and scrolled. A news article about a news station finding a recording of P from when he was about eleven years old. I felt like my wish had come true. But when I looked at the date of the news release, it made me realize that perhaps when I was having those wishful thoughts, it was actually him telling me about this thing, and I just misunderstood thinking it was my thoughts. Telepathy is funny like that. A similar thing happened when the Prince Estate released a collection of face masks for covid. I literally saw the designs in my head, and they were released in an announcement shortly after, exactly what I saw! What a trippy feeling!

I can’t wait until it is finally warm enough to start working in the garden again. I’ve been planning out the garden in my mind and looking for seeds. I’m thinking about a bed of sweet violets, how the smell would be glorious in bloom.

Now that’s it’s been six years since his passing. It feels like a long time ago, because the world is such a different place now. What I wouldn’t give to be in a more innocent world… There are going to be more difficult times ahead for many people. My hope is that people make things right in their lives before it’s too late.

Prince lived his life fully. He accomplished many things with the time that he had. And I know, he left this world knowing that there was more he would have liked to do. But for the most part, he had pursued all his interests to a level of personal satisfaction. Not many people can say that. His dear friend, Lenny Kravitz said that about himself in an interview mentioning Prince. For myself, I am doing that. I am revisiting interests, making right of things that I did wrong, salvaging projects that I didn’t finish, pursuing interests with a renewed perspective and confidence. Accomplishing and doing things that my younger self would not have dared to try. I am happy doing these things, and I know I will one day leave this world feeling fulfilled and grateful for all I had gotten to experience.

I hope you are all doing well, staying sae out there in this world.

P SHOWS OFF OUR NEW LABEL DESIGNS – EVP February 14, 2022

A new month just began, and I am so very much looking forward to spring. I am anticipating working in the garden again, picking and drying flowers and leaves. It will still be a few months before any real work in the garden can begin. They said it may be an early spring this year. Still, we await for the last of the winter snow to be gone. I am knitting this silk mohair scarf that will go in my Etsy shop. Its airy texture is just right for the transition into spring. There are some in other colors already in the shop.

I’ve kept busy with working on my product designs for my shop. I haven’t been doing as much EVP recording. BUt I did do one for Valentine’s Day. I recorded with the EVPMaker running as the background sound.

I heard P talking to someone, telling them that he drew the labels on my jars. “Draw the labels”. I had used P’s channeled drawing for my label designs.

Then he said, “I draw it”. I think he’s happy with the label design, proud, as am I. It is our collaboration.

Then it sounded like P had another visitor. I heard him tell someone to come inside. Then he said, “That’s my mom”. At the part where he says “mom”, you hear his voice shift between his spirit voice and the sample voice. Hearing that makes me smile. I can tell, he loves his mom so much.

There used to be a time when I worried about spirits coming and going into our space as they pleased. But it sounds like P is able to lock down his space and only let in people he wants.

Long time readers of my blog will know about the channeled drawings from P. This was kind of our early form of communication when I first discovered his presence. I would hold my finger over the iPad screen and it would glide over the screen making these drawings. Often I would receive drawings of flowers.

For a long time, I’ve wanted t design new labels for my balm jars. But none of the designs I came up with felt good enough. I wanted its design to vibe with who I am. Finally, it has come! Thank you, P.

These recordings were recorded using my EVP Wrist Recorder 3 on February 14, 2022.

FRIENDS IN SPIRIT, JUST HANGING OUT – EVP November 27, 2021

Do spirits get lonely? My answer is, they don’t seem to be, in my observation. If they are, it is by choice, because they don’t have to be, there is just so many of them over there. However depending on the attitude of the spirit, they might create a situation of isolation. I once captured an EVP where the voice of a young boy moaned, “Why is no one here?”. Others were able to hear him and they advised him on how to break out of his isolation.

To my knowledge, P is doing very well, and he is happy. He is surrounded by so many friends by his side. I often hear him having conversations with others. They seem really joyous, reminiscent of the joy of friends hanging out as children.

Here are 2 clips from my most recent EVP recording session with the EVPmaker. It sounded to me like P had visitors with him.

Someone asked him about his dog. He replied, “That’s Mia”. You can hear him in the background between the gibberish. Then at the end of the clip, Mia barked, as if to respond! She is so cute.

I had my collection of silk scarves hanging on the rack in the room. P told the guests, “Andrea make them scarves, silk scarves”. I’ve often noticed P showing my work to his guests. I’m really touched that they take an interest.

These recordings were recorded using my EVP Wrist Recorder 3 on November 27, 2021.

PRINCE AND I TRY EVP MAKER 2.5 – May 21, 2021

I recently started using a program called EVP Maker to record EVP. The software allows you to import speech samples and then generate a random gibberish from the sample. I have found that spirits don’t really sound the way they did in life, as they no longer have vocal cords. My theory is that they use thoughts to speak, and somehow these thoughts generate a frequency that can affect the sounds in our environment. So creating a gibberish from the person’s voice can help them speak in the voice we knew them for. It’s not a perfect technology, it doesn’t work all the time, and they can sound robotic. But it can give very tangible results that are audible to most ears. I’ve found that EVPs recorded in silence are near impossible to hear. I do have the ability to hear them, but I can rarely make out what is being said from their chatter.

Contrary to what people might assume, it is not assembling the chopped up syllables together in any way. The way it works with customized gibberish, is that the sound of the gibberish allows them to speak over it and it results in blending their voice into it, so that it sounds like them. Sometimes I hear it being described as “changing the sound”, but I don’t feel that it is accurate to say that, as it would assume that they are doing it intentionally. I think this occurs naturally, like a scientific law; when these circumstances are present, this is what occurs. Like when you put a mic close to a speaker, feedback will occur. The reason you want a randomly generated gibberish is so that there are no words in the sound sample that could be mistaken for an EVP utterance.

The process is a little annoying for me, as the program can only be run on Windows. I have to use my old computer, which is very slow to work with. At first I didn’t hear much, but as I went through the recordings slowly, I found more clips that I didn’t notice earlier. Here are some clips from my recording sessions. Please note, they don’t speak like us any more, so you cannot expect perfectly sounding speech on EVP. In some clips, the syllables are spaced out, it varies.

This was from the very first recording, he says, “That’s the first time. Speak to me”.

“Hold on… Let’s see if work… That’s better”.

He said, “Always loved you. Ha. I sound funny”.

Then I heard, a basketball bounce, “Duane here”. Usually a basketball bounce means his half-brother is around. P said, “Basketball game here (bounce), I’m gonna watch”. P loves basketball, and his brother was a professional player. Later, he worked as a bodyguard for P.

I came back later and tried another recording. I asked him to try to say his name, “Prince Rogers Nelson”. The Prince part didn’t come out with the gibberish, but you can hear “Prince” spoken, and then “Rogers Nelson” very clearly immediately after in the gibberish.

He said, “I’m happy with Andrea”.

I wanted to make a recording of the gibberish itself, but I couldn’t figure out how to record what was coming from the computer and not from the mic. I caught P in conversation with others. He said, “I’m reading to them, passport, my book”. I thought this was a bit strange, Passport? Then I realized, there’s a pic of P’s passport in his book. I guess he was showing some people his memoir.

“That’s my passport”. I have to say, that it is one good looking passport photo, Must be the best I’ve ever seen. (Refer to above photo)

This is quite an exciting discovery. I wish it could run on Mac, or if someone could make an app version for mobile devices. I will definitely try it out again in the future.

Image above: “P Passport” by Andrea Mai.

SPIRITS AFRAID OF GOING INTO THE LIGHT – EVP May 10, 2021

Here in the Toronto area, we are still in lockdown mode. Even though we are stuck at home, time seems to keep flying away. There are so many things to occupy my time. I am surprise how quickly a day goes by.

I recently did a recording while walking home from the post office. I found an interesting conversation was taking place. It seemed to be that a spirit reached out to P, asking for help “going home”. It’s not the first time I’ve heard something like this. But I find it interesting every time. It seems to have become a job for P. I”m not sure if spirits find him randomly, or if they are sent to seek him out. Maybe it’s both. He seems to have developed a reputation for helping others over there.

There was some time ago when I had heard some people telling people that the whole “going into the light” thing was bad. Like it was a trap. This was before I heard the stuff on my recordings. Sometimes people (including mediums) will claim things without any evidence behind it. People will state their beliefs as fact, or assume that intuition is always correct. Since doing EVP, I have become very cautious about what I believe. This might make me sound like a pessimist, but really, I’m just looking for real answers. There are some things I can say I know with certainty, and others that I do not. Rather than assume the facts, I accept the fact that I don’t know everything, and sometimes knowing something only leads to more unanswered questions. I’m OK with not knowing, though I am greatly fascinated by the mysteries.

My recording was done while walking home, so you are going to hear the cars whizzing by, and the rhythm of me walking down the street. It’s not the greatest recording, but you can hear them talking. I was alone, no one else nearby. It helps to listen with headphones. They are repeating on loop. If you are new to listening to EVP, the trick to hearing them is to listen past the background noise, and listen selectively for voices. It’s like Magic Eye for ears.

A voice is heard, “Come, go into the light”.

A voice says, “I want to go home”. This clip is more faint than others.

Someone says, “Don’t be afraid”.

P says, “Go into the light”.

The spirit says, “I feel scared”. It sounds like a young boy. This is not indicative of the person’s age at death. I’ve found that age is not a factor over there, it seems. P often sounds very young.

P seems to bring his dog, Mia with him everywhere we go. Sometimes I hear him talking to her. Here he says, “Go in front, Mia”. I think sometimes Mia lags behind, and he’s telling her to stay in front where he can see her.

The rest of the conversation was hard to hear. But I heard that angels came to escort this person into the light. When I got home, someone told P, “I like your jewellery”.

I recently heard another plea for help crossing over, when I was waiting in the car at the grocery store parking lot. A voice said, “Wanna go to heaven”.

Sometimes people want to know why P is here with me. That’s beyond my knowledge as to why exactly how it all works. All I know is that he’s here, he’s helping other spirits, he was placed here after he met God. Sometimes people allude to him possibly being bad, because he is here, as opposed to being somewhere in “heaven”. All I can say is that, look I don’t know how it all works, exactly. But angels are here with us, and they are not bad, so go figure.

There are just so many things that we don’t know!

Nonetheless, I feel fortunate to be able to discover such things, and share them with the world, whoever wants to hear about it!

These recordings were recorded using my EVP Wrist Recorder 3 on May 10, 2021.

Image above: “Prince Sun” by Andrea Mai.

SOMETIMES IT SNOWS IN APRIL – PRINCE CELEBRATION 2021

Today is Prince’s five-year anniversary since his passing. Ever since that year, I’ve noticed snow in April. Like the title of his song, Sometimes it Snows in April. It was never like that before, here in Toronto. And this year, I woke up to a yard full of snow. It was a strong reminder to me that he is here with me.

I decided to go out for a morning walk, and I took my camera with me.

Five years seems like a long time ago. So much has happened since. The world is really a different place now. It’s weird, it’s like become less innocent. I feel nostalgic for simpler times, preferably the 2000’s. When we still bought music on CD, and people didn’t rely on social media to communicate. People seemed nicer back then. More civilized.

Later in the day, I made this piece of artwork in his honor. I experimented with some new materialsI recently acquired, making this UV print with some lace and a necklace of his symbol.

I hope you’re all doing well, keeping safe. Ttyl.

Image above: “Flowers in snow” by Andrea Mai.

RECORDING OF PRINCE’S DOVE IN SPIRIT, 2021 NEW YEAR GREETING AND CATCH UP

First of all, I want to wish all my readers a Happy New Year. I hope you are doing well and that the new year will bring you something great, in spite of the world situation. Things here have been ticking along, the usual year end stuff, catching up on paperwork, getting things organized.

On New Year’s I recorded EVP, and heard someone come to greet us “Happy New Year”, as the fireworks were going off in my neighbour’s yard.

I have been reviewing EVP from over the summer, and I found a clip of a bird tweeting inside my home. I don’t have any birds or pets. And then I heard someone, kind of faintly, saying, “Play with dove”.

I thought to myself, could it be? Prince’s dove? I’d seen him in my miind’s eye, fluttering about our home. But I hadn’t any confirmation of this.

Then I heard someone say, “What’s is its name?”

I heard P reply, “Majesty”.

Prince had a pair of doves at Paisley Park. Divinity, female, and Majesty, male. Majesty died in 2017. Divinity and Majesty were both featured on the last track of Prince’s One Nite Alone album, titled Arboretum. Isn’t it nice to know that you can be reunited wit old pets?

Over the summer, I recorded while I was at Costco. I heard this voice say, “Mon cheri”. That is French for, my dear.

Due to covid-19 precautions, they no longer hand out food samples. I’ve often heard EVP voices calling out to people to try the samples. This one was saying, “Green tea”.

P often gets recognized by other spirits. Very often, people comment, “You’re Prince”.

I found this clip of someone saying, “Now we’re lost”. I wonder what they meant by that, if they are lost inside Costco, or lost in the greater sense of things.

Someone said, “Look out”. You can hear shopping carts crashing into each other. I found this to be a common thing, that spirits will warn people of potential harm.

A voice here is saying, “Keep more fish”. I guess they were telling someone to stock up on fish as prep for more future lockdowns.

Some of you might be wondering what my take is on the whole virus situation is. Some of you know that I make and sell face masks. While I am aware of conspiracy by shadow governments, I am not buying what the alternative media is selling either. I don’t believe that anyone out there is spilling the straight truth about the situation. Alternative media is often used as controlled opposition to create the illusion of choice. It is a psychological warfare tactic. Offer them two choices that you want the public to choose from, both choices resulting in what it is you want to accomplish. Either way, if you buy into any of the two choices, you are falling into their trap. People accuse each other of not thinking for themselves, meanwhile they are still choosing one of the two given narratives. I don’t believe in either of the “official” narratives. My view is that every person is responsible for their own well being, therefore taking precautions in order to mitigate risk. You will not see me out there in a crowd protesting lockdowns, nor are you ever gonna see me in line for a vaccine. Think for yourselves. Question everything. Pay attention to what they are saying and pay attention to what they aren’t saying. Demand proof for all claims. So many alternative media figures claim to know what’s going on, they claim insider info, secret whistleblower sources. One’s credibility is in the proof they provide, not what they say. Don’t trust, verify! When you line up all the narratives and they don’t make sense, you know that something else is going on.

God bless, and take care of yourselves.

These recordings were recorded using my EVP Wrist Recorder 3 in 2020.

Image above: “Winter berries” by Andrea Mai.

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